by Brenda McGraw
I expected more than I was receiving and set myself up for disappointment. Has that ever happened to you?
I have discovered over the years that we can get an idea of something we want and then end up crying because we don’t receive it. For instance, it’s almost Valentine’s Day. As a woman, we many times wish that our man would buy us flowers, a card, or come up with something creative. But when he doesn’t, we get disappointed and end up having a bad day. Maybe the tears start flowing and we are hurt. I don’t think our guys even know what they did. We have to remember ladies, guys don’t think like we do. For the most part, they don’t care about getting a card, they don’t like flowers, and Valentine’s Day doesn’t have the same meaning to them that it does to us.
Do you want to have a Valentine’s Day on which you don’t get sad or mad? How about a day filled with joy, no matter what happens or who remembers you or doesn’t remember you?
Have no expectations!
Don’t expect anything and guess what—you won’t be disappointed!
But how can we reveal our hidden wishes to our men? After all, our guys love us and want to satisfy us. I really don’t think they set out to hurt or forget us. My sweet guy goes above and beyond to satisfy me. He listens when I talk. However, that is the exception. It has not always been that way for me.
Communication involves speaking in a way that reveals what we want the recipient of our thoughts to understand. When we are able to exchange our thoughts, desires, and conversation in a way that indicates what would satisfy and please us, and motivate someone we love to get what we are thinking, than we have communicated effectively. To place expectations on others without their knowledge of what we wish to receive is unfair.
Valentine’s Day should not be about what we receive, but more about what it means to love those God has placed in our lives.
What is true love?
Love is an “intense feeling of deep affection” and sincere adoration for another person, thing, or being—further defined as warmth, tenderness, intimacy, attachment, endearment, devotion, passion, and worship.
How can we love like that? How can we expect someone else to love us like that? We can’t possibly place someone so high on a pedestal that we expect him or her to satisfy us when we aren’t willing to satisfy him or her at times.
For instance, when we withhold love or intimacy from our guys, how is that showing them they are important? How about flipping it around a bit? We can be disappointed when our guys don’t satisfy us with a special something on Valentine’s Day, but do you think possibly all they wanted was some alone time with you? They aren’t going to cry tears of sadness or show their disappointment like we women do, but they will slowly withdraw from trying to please or communicate with us. Not the results we would ever desire. Forgive us Lord.
Love is a circle of faith! When you find someone you love, your circle is with one another. It displays love with the words, “I love you. You love me.” “How can I make your life better while in turn you are making my life better?” “Let me bring joy and peace to you without any expectations.” In giving that joy and peace, we will receive blessings so immeasurable that we will love the other person even more. Love deeply. Be true to your love. We can forever experience a circle of love and faith! You give—you receive! You bless—you are blessed! You love—you are loved!
I learned twenty years ago that the only love that never disappoints is the One True Love, and His name is Jesus. Yes, we will be disappointed again at some time in our lives because people disappoint. However, God doesn’t disappoint. His love is greater. His love is higher. His love expects nothing in return, but gives and gives passionately through daily whispers, touches, kisses, and embracing hugs. His love runs so deep and so wide that it cannot ever be compared with the love of anyone else. It is True Love.
When you are sad, I wish you joy.
When you are tired, I wish you rest.
When you are distressed, I wish you peace.
When you are lonely, I wish you friends.
When you are discouraged, I wish you hope!
When you are forgotten, I wish you love!
“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” 1 Peter 4:8 NIV
My God is an awesome God! His love, peace, joy, and hope endure forever! God is love. He never runs out of love. He has enough love for all who come to Him with open arms lifted high, softened hearts and ears to hear, “I love you, sweet child of mine. I always have and I always will.”
I hope you have a very “Happy Valentine’s Day!”
Discover Joy Beyond the Clutter of Life, Found out how here.
Brenda McGraw is an author and speaker who reveals how to discover joy beyond the clutter of life. She draws from her own life experiences in the #1 Amazon Best seller, “Joy Beyond, 28 Days to Finding Joy Beyond the Clutter of Life”. She is the founder of Ask God Today Ministries where she has a team of writers sharing truth and hope with others.
Brenda currently lives in South Carolina with her husband, Jeff and three of their five children. She is a survivor of breast cancer and a heart attack.. Despite the challenges she has endured, Brenda found peace through her relationship with Jesus Christ.
You can connect with Brenda McGraw at:
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