The pain through the tears had me holding onto the only thing I thought could heal me, God. Bedrooms walls
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“I once was lost but now I am found. I was blind but now I see.” These are the words of the song, Amazing Grace. But they are more than just a song, they are a reality for me and maybe they are a reality for you as well.

Inside the walls of our homes are where we let down our hair, put on our comfy clothes and be ourselves. Good or bad, what you see is what you get.

Inside the walls is where abuse

happens, screaming matches occur, and drugs and alcohol are used to the extreme.

Inside the walls tears flow, hearts hurt, lies are told and love can be lost.

I lived inside the walls and so do many others. I lived through the heartache of drugs and alcohol and the addiction of someone I loved and trusted.
The devastation drove me to my knees begging God to save my family.

There are women everyday who live with physical, mental and verbal abuse; the pain begins inside the walls and reaches far outside into their everyday life.

When you can’t see through the tears and fears,
our precious Lord is waiting to restore all the years.

On my knees I cried and lifted my tears to my Lord. I prayed. I asked God to take my tears and use them for His glory. I didn’t want all of the pain of divorce and co-dependency to be in vain.

Inside the walls Jesus wipes the tears, peace steps over fears and joy satisfies the deepest innermost part of our being.

Inside the walls hearts heal, lies are shattered and love is restored.

When Jesus enters inside the walls He births new beginnings, tears down the old and refurbishes and remodels to bring beauty beyond the clutter.

Once I was lost! I lived in what I call my “before Jesus days.” Regrets, guilt and shame describe how I feel at times when I now have to stand up and admit things from long ago, when my children ask about my past.

But, now I am found. I was blind, but now I see. God opened my eyes and gave me vision. Even though I didn’t see Him, He never lost sight of me, He heard my cries and He saved from more devastation and pain.

I am restored by the King and through Him I can do anything. When He calls I will answer. Where He leads I will follow.

Once upon a time I didn’t feel joy and wondered if I would ever smile again. The circumstances and clutter kept me hiding inside the walls. I would cover up the pain until one day I discovered the courage I needed through Christ to let the truth be known. It is true when Scripture says “the truth will set you free.”

Ten years later I proclaim:

My joy is now complete. God has restored all the years the locusts ate. I am a daughter of the One true King. He loves me with an everlasting love. His faithfulness cannot be denied. It has been proven by many. His plans are greater than all we can imagine.

“Satisfy us in the morning with Your unfailing love,
that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.” Psalm 90:14

I let Jesus inside my walls and now my home is full of beauty and peace.
Please let me know how I can pray for you?

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About Brenda McGraw

Brenda McGraw is the founder of Ask God Today Ministries where a team of writers share hope and truth with others. She has a God-given dream to reach the masses with the gospel of Christ. Brenda is an author and speaker who reveals how to discover joy beyond the clutter of life. She draws from her own life experiences in the #1 Amazon Best seller,“Joy Beyond, 28 Days to Finding Joy Beyond the Clutter of Life”. She has two new books released. Finished, Top Ten Steps to Finish Writing a Book and Living Uncluttered, An Abundant Life Bible Study. Brenda lives in South Carolina with her husband, Jeff and one of their five children. She is a survivor of breast cancer and a heart attack. Despite the challenges she has endured, Brenda found peace through her relationship with Jesus Christ.
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